The Wind Beneath My Wings
by leibyisroel
Summary: Kerry reflects about Mark


Disclaimers: I do not own or have any relation with anyone from ER, nor do I own the rights to the song _The Wind Beneath My Wings_ by Bette Midler.   
Spoilers: Through Season 8 (including speculations).   
Characters: KW/MG   
Rating: G 

Oh, oh, oh, oh   
It must have been cold there in my shadow,   
to never have sunlight on your face.   
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.   
You always walked a step behind. 

I can't believe he's gone. And all those times I acted so proud of being in charge when in reality he was the one leading the ER. Why didn't he ever speak up? Everyone knew he was the backbone but never told him, he let me be the one to shine. And when needed, he took the blame, but never the praise. 

So I was the one with all the glory,   
while you were the one with all the strain.   
A beautiful face without a name for so long.   
A beautiful smile to hide the pain. 

While I was busy making sure everyone knew I was the one in charge, he was in the back making sure everything was running smoothly. Never a complaint from him, just gentle hints on how to make things run more smoothly. Even when I made those mistakes, he let me make them, let me think I was the one in charge, then he quietly changed them to be the way people would better like them. 

Did you ever know that you're my hero,   
and everything I would like to be?   
I can fly higher than an eagle,   
for you are the wind beneath my wings. 

I realize now he was the one who held the ER together. Everyone went to him with their problems, their concerns, their hopes, their dreams. Why didn't I? Even when it came out about me, he was the one to not care. 

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,   
but I've got it all here in my heart.   
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.   
I would be nothing without you. 

He made it so easy for me here. Now he's gone and I'm alone. I wish I could be like him, but how can I? He was one of a kind. Everyone liked him, he almost grew up here. All the staff liked him, from the management down to the cafeteria workers and janitors. How did he get them all to respect him and like him? How will I survive without him? 

Did you ever know that you're my hero?   
You're everything I wish I could be.   
I could fly higher than an eagle,   
for you are the wind beneath my wings. 

Even with all that was going on with him, with his broken home, his parents dying, his friends leaving, his daughters, his illness, his attack, he kept the ER running. How could he be so strong for us when he was breaking on the inside? He was always there to care for anyone who needed it, no matter what was wrong with his life. How did he manage to keep everything running so smooth when his life was in such turmoil? 

Did I ever tell you you're my hero?   
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.   
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,   
for you are the wind beneath my wings,   
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings. 

And I never told him. I never acknowledged his being there, his help, his strength. All those times he eased the way for my administrative decisions, all those favours he did without acknowledgement or being asked. The times he took the rap so others wouldn't be hurt. When he came back to work after the incidents, strong as ever. When he submitted to the tests for me, even when he denied anything being wrong – and he was right. 

Oh, the wind beneath my wings.   
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.   
Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.   
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.   
Oh you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings. 

And I stepped on him, I backed down on my word to him. I just forged ahead to get the best for me, come what may to him and others. He let me. He didn't fight back. He kept his word even after I let him down. Sure he said something sometimes, but never a lot, and he never took it further. I wish I could have his strength. 

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,   
so high I almost touch the sky.   
Thank you, thank you,   
thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings. 

And I never thanked him. Now it's too late. Good-bye Mark, and thanks for everything. 

Back to home 


End file.
